But I Say… Everyone Who Divorces…  Part 1: Follow Up

John:

Back a couple of videos ago we did some lessons on the idea of divorce found in Matthew chapter 5 in the Sermon on the Mount. And due to those videos, and you might want to go back and check out those videos before you listen to this one. But a question was asked, “Well, what about those that might be involved in abusive relationships? What can they do? How does that work?” If you’d like to find out, stay with us we’ll be right back.

Intro

Barry:

You know the question was posed to us about you know when you talk about divorce you see this idea that God has established a marriage, and what God has put together let no man put asunder. And in that he only gives the only criteria for divorce is sexual immorality. But there are times when people find themselves in a situation where maybe they have a spouse who is abusive to them. Or someone who is an unbeliever that would be keeping them from serving God. That kind of situations you know situations where you would think of how could you stay with that person and still be doing God’s will.

John:

Right.

Barry:

And I really think this is the same questions that come up in 1 Corinthians chapter 7. Because we see there Paul talks about the idea of marriage and divorce. And he starts by saying this is what the Lord said. In other words, here’s the general principle that Jesus taught. But then he starts to try to answer those thorny questions that come up. Questions like we talked about earlier. And I think in that passage he gives an understanding of that someone could not be with their spouse, be separated from them, but not in terms of themselves instigating divorce.

John:

And that’s true. And you know when it comes to the idea of marriage it truly is something that God ordained. But yet as “Mary” mentioned we sometimes find ourselves in situations where there can be abuse. There can be those ideas of where one spouse is not fulfilling their marriage responsibilities. And Paul talks about that here in 1 Corinthians chapter 7. In fact, he mentions to them how he wishes that all could be as he was. Of course, he was unmarried, but he does speak about the idea of those that might find themselves in a situation where they simply might have to separate whether they be an unbeliever or so forth.

And he sets forth very clearly though that when it comes to marriage, we should keep our vows. We’ve made a promise. And so, involved in that, we have individuals that have made the decision to come together. They have determined to live together as husband and wife. And so they do have responsibilities to fill. But when that happens, what do they do?

Barry

You know, I think what you have to stop and think with these situations is when God creates something he creates it perfect. But sin corrupts what’s done. It’s always been that way. And marriage is a perfect example of that. When you have sin, and human beings have sin, you have sin where you don’t love your neighbor as yourself, you don’t love your spouse as you’re supposed to. You know we see in Ephesians when he talks about husbands to love their wife as Christ loved the church. And sometimes husbands don’t love their wife, not definitely not how Christ loved the church. Maybe not even how you should treat a dog or any you know your pet. You’d treat them better than some people treat their spouses. But what we see in the passages is Paul talks about that idea that, because someone else is sinning, don’t let that cause you to sin further.

Now you don’t have to, as he says. You know you can be separate. If they won’t you know they won’t submit to the Lord they may set you can separate. That doesn’t mean that you should so to say then this gives me the right to go and do something that would be wrong and in the sight of God. You may separate from that person but that doesn’t mean that you should go necessarily and go find someone else immediately. That’s not what’s being authorized here. But it isn’t saying that you have to stay in a situation where you would find yourself in danger. Or you would find yourself being yourself caused to sin. And so I think that’s an important principle to understand.

And I think it also shows us this idea that God, when man sins,  God works to fix man’s sin problem. That doesn’t mean we always escape the consequences of sin. But he does give us hope for the future. Maybe not even in this life. We may have it may make our life harder in this life. But this life isn’t always what we’re considering. We are considering that our life here is a vapor, and eternity is forever. And so we would never want to put our situation on earth to do something that would put us in danger of missing eternity. And I think that’s the important part of this. And to not let sin cause us to be drawn into more sin.

John:

And while God did in fact institute marriage for our happiness our enjoyment it is important to remember that God did set the parameters of what a marriage should be and how it should work. And also understanding that one does not have to be married to be happy. Nor does one have to stay in a relationship wherein they are being abused.

Nevertheless, we must keep in mind the commandments of Jesus and his teachings in Matthew chapter 19, where he does give the reason that one may divorce and marry another, that being for sexually immoral. In that same context he does mention the idea that there are some that have to remain unmarried because they come into a situation where that is the only way they can live. And so, for those that are find themselves in abusive situations realize that there is hope. There is forgiveness in Christ. And anybody can change. So never give up on the possibility. In fact, the 1 Corinthians chapter 7, Paul does mention the idea to be reconciled if at all possible.

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